Thursday, January 29, 2009
i dont like anecdotes. it sucks lar. i dunno how to do. i hate english!! why did someone invent something like english?? chinese so good lar.
and i dont like maths also. why arh. all the mathematicians. so stupid! if not for them maths now would still be within our ten fingers lor! but i starting to like my maths teacher lar. haha. dunno why. but when he teaches it's not really clear lar. but. aiya dunno lar.
my seasons starting soon. er. i scared i wont be able to catch up with lessons after that. but i'm sorta happy i can pwn a bit of school lar. haha xD i so naughty boy! aiya but boys will be boys. i just feel damn good to be in team. even though i didn't play selection. yea.
today i bite the inside of my left cheek a lot of time arh. damn pain kay. oowww.
i flunking jap.
i dont want to study english.
physics is damn sian.
maths is damn troublesome.
geog is the most funn :):) cos geog period = sleeping time. geog time is my free time. coss... i dont take geog! orh yyeaa! haha. i love geog periods. can sleep in the library. how lovely. i love to sleep. during school time. lsat year i slept in almost every maths and chem and geog and hist classes lor. this year trying damn hard not to. but still fall asleep. haha. I LOVE SLEEPING IN CLASS!!!!
Ng Guan Yi at 10:48 PM
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
er.. this is a happy post. so people reading this must be damn happy k! haha. throw it away forget yesterday! haha. and that other gay person can dont use gay? gay is reserved for a damn special person k can you just use another name or **** off.
er. today. dunno what to say. er. malaysia i went to a mangrove swamp. that was the first time i went to somewhere like that. er. it was quite fun la. but the feet damn pain! haha. cannot wear shoes know. so there were a lot of those breathing roots damn sharp i stepped on a lot of them damn pain! and there were a lot of times i stepped on the mud and half my leg sunk into the mud. then when it dried it became hard, so my whole leg was damn stiff. and then after i washed it off i realised i got a lot of insect bites. cos when the mud was there i couldn't see the insects so yea. after wash off then i know. but it was fun la.
but it was damn difficult to sleep at night. four people cram into one double bed. normally i one person sleep one double bed one lor. so it was like, you couldn't even move. even if you moved. like one person move, everybody will start bouncing. the bed will bounce everybody off lor. yupp.
i think it's damn fast now i'm sec 3. next year i'll be sec 4. and then i wont be training in ri gym again. people dont even go in sec4 after the seasons lor. how i wish i was one year younger. then there'll be one more year of training in ri gym. one more year of looking forward to friday trainings cos... er you know why lar. haha.
oh and i want to learn music! electric guitar bass guitar acoustic guitar and drums. yupp. i dont really like piano. although i think it's damn cool. but it just isn't my style. yeaa. i seriously want to learn lor. and then learn singing. can sing for my girlfriend next time. haha. all i think of is my girlfriend la. but the thing is i dont even have one. crap right. but now i not in a hurry to get one. i'll be a better man. before i find a girlfriend. i want every one of my relationships to last. not like the last one. i want every one to last. i will wait until J2. year 2 lar yup.
and my comp damn irritating. keep on telling me my window not genuine. of course not genuine la! why genuine. i use genuine windows i can fly meh. not genuine one so cheap who call you genuine deh. of course use fake one lar.
my re screwing up. haven't start yet screwing up ready lar. aiya dunno. dun care.
i saw amanda sign in!! you signed in!! why i go see again you offline walau!! cheating bugg lar you. haha xD dont appear offline next time k! haha. but now i think i gotta go ready. shit la. buhbyee.
Ng Guan Yi at 10:54 PM
Monday, January 26, 2009
er. i went to malaysia. yupp. some people probably knew about it. the first day we went to some mangrove swamp. at first i thought i'd afraid of getting dirty. but in fact i wasn't. haha. and i had fun. yea.
actually i wanted to say a lot of things. a lot a lot. but now dont have ready. i dunno how to say how i feel. all mixed up. anybody who knows me would never believe that i'm a person who'd let a tear drop. i too didn't believe it. until now. baby, my eyes are sore. i almost washed my face with tears. and i dont think i can get over it so soon. i shouldn't have come online today at all. then nothing would have happened. when vicky dumped me i promised myself it'll be the last time i'll cry. but today i broke that promise. i so totally broke it. inside out outside in i fucked it all up. i'm sorry i cried again. you think i wanted to i didn't want to. i'm shattered all over again. bloody hell. i'm sorry i'm not making any sense but what sense does sense make. everybody sucks.
sadness is beautiful. but the one i'm feeling now is not. it's fucking me up and i think i gotta rest now. because my eyes are really sore. from what, you know. everybody evrybody everybody sucks.
Ng Guan Yi at 1:32 PM
Friday, January 23, 2009
hey shit. i kena daoed. did i do anything wrong? why? dont do this to me leh..
Ng Guan Yi at 10:22 PM
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
what man. even if she can't shuttup i still wanna talk to her. it's not for my well being if i should stop talking to her. it's the last thing i want to happen, no matter what. it doesn't matter if she cant shuttup. i just need her. and i dont wanna stop talking to her. I DONT WANNA.
Ng Guan Yi at 10:21 PM
Monday, January 19, 2009
today i almost made someone stop talking to me. and she's the last person i want to be daoed by. she calls me retarded everyday but i just couldn't take it today when my friend told me she called me reetarded. and i wanna fuck myself for that. sorry okay. i wasn't in a good mood la. i just wasn't. this morning started off fine.. until i found out that yuan chi actually passed away. i mean, he's a friend ok. although we were not really close but i felt it ok. i was so schocked when i heard it. i felt the loss. and i felt the pain. it's already sad enough la. then during training i have to know that she told another person i'm retarded. then i couldn't take it. and almost made her dao me. today is the lousiest day in my life.
Ng Guan Yi at 11:16 PM
Sunday, January 18, 2009
I shouldn't love you
But I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you
But I can't move
I can't look away
And I don't know
How to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop
Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around
I can't let him win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know
It's getting hard to be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way
And I don't know
How to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know
How to make a feeling stop
Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around
I can't let him win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know
This emptiness is killing me
I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back, I realize it was always there just never spoken
I'm waiting here...
Been waiting here...
Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around
I can't let him win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know
Ng Guan Yi at 3:41 PM
this morning, i dreamt that i became a gangster. then as i was walking along outside some pubs, i accidentally banged into another gangster, then he sent his men to whack me. but i ran away and one followed. i ran and ran until i went into a car park, then i fought him. i won the fight by a lot. and i almost let him go alive. but then i turned back and killed him. then i ran away. then i was damn scared that the police will come after me. but for damn long they didn't find out it was me. so i carried on with life. except that i didn't do the things gangster did anymore. then i found the love of my life. and we got married. then shortly after we got married, i was arrested and sentenced to life imprisonment. then i started regretting why i ever got into the triad. yea. then i woke up, and found myself crying damn hard. like my eyes were sore. shit i don't know why ok. it was just a dream. but it was vivid. i still remember every detail now. i still remember.
i think i'm very much like a girl right. when i watch touching love stories i'll cry. when i hear sad or touching songs i'll cry. when i see sad or touching scenes on tv or movie i'll cry. and this morning i cried because of a dream.. why do i cry so easily?? i wanna be a little stronger. just a little is enough k. i wanna be stronger.
Ng Guan Yi at 1:59 AM
hey i've been wondering for damn long ready.. how do you pronounce "hsiung" ?? i've been wondering for damn damn long ready ok.
Ng Guan Yi at 1:35 AM
Monday, January 12, 2009
eh i realised yesterday's post i said i dont want to talk about obs.. but all i talked about was obs. haha. bloody hell. yea and now rgs sec 3 first day in obs. i very worried for my friends siia. the damn heavy backpacks and the walking and everything la. i hope it won't rain. really i hope it'll be good for them. it's already quite tough and especially for girls la. so i hope the rain won't make it tougher than it already is.
and i know vicky will surely reflect a lot la. but isn't that good. cos in obs, you have to reflect. when you dont reflect, you dont learn anything you dont get away with anything. so you should reflect. yupp. and see the good in life. notice the beautiful surroundings and everything, which i didn't manage to. i didn't see anything. yupp. i hope they will. and forget the pain as in like when trekking dont go think about the heavy backpack and the long distances. LOOK at the things around. and still got. must never give up. cos we usually can do more than we think we can. we can climb higher than we thought we can before trying. we can walk further than we thought we can. we must never give up. no matter in what point of time. even when you feel like doing so, fuck the idea of giving up. we must never.
"the same sun that melts the wax, hardens the clay."
Ng Guan Yi at 10:37 PM
Sunday, January 11, 2009
after first day of obs, i missed singapore a lot. got bed got car not like have to pitch tent or something. then after the first day i missed cars even more. cos the backpacks were really heavy!! although much lighter than the instructors'. yea. and they were quite fun. haha. but overall it was quite fun la. all i can say is that obs changed me a lot. i feel like a complete different person. yea.
i dont want to spend all my time talking about obs. cos the experience cannot be described. yea. my mood for the past few days since i got back from obs was quite good. i was very high. i managed to manage all my anger until they were gone la. yupp. tomorrow rgs going for obs. i got a lot of friends in rgs. which means i got a lot of friends going for obs tomorrow. i wish them all good luck. really. haha xD
during all the five days of obs, i missed one person a lot a lot. i cannot say the name. cos if i talk about her then she'll say i'm creepy again. haha. and even if i told her i like her very much she wont believe me also la. so what's the point. haha. k i should go ready. bye.
Ng Guan Yi at 11:29 PM
Sunday, January 4, 2009
i dont want to go OBS
Ng Guan Yi at 2:32 AM
Thursday, January 1, 2009
tomorrow is school reopen. actually i only had ten minutes on the comp. yea. but seems like i can't talk to the person i wanted to talk to ready.. i dunno whether she's appearing offline or really offline. dunno. oh shit. today feels really weird. cos never talk to her.. aiya. shit la. my time's up. bye.
Ng Guan Yi at 10:27 PM