Thursday, November 27, 2008
hey today i won parry!! 11-3. yea. and that's a happy thing. cos parry is damn pro. really damn pro okay.. yea. and i use 滑面(dunno whether it's this hua) still quite good okay.. i just realised that. i still know how to block and flip and 拉. and really a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot better than before i changed to 长较. and i'm quite happy lor.
i think i'm a very petty person. whenever i see ....... i get very uncomfortable. i know she's not my anybody and i'm not her anybody and i'm not in any position to be jealous, but i think that's what i'm feeling and i can't help it. i really can't. and i dunno how to control my emotions and that's why my emotions are always in a mess. and that's why i try to never feel anything when i'm outside (as in not at home) or when anybody else is around. then when i'm alone and i think of what happened before or what i saw or whatever then i'll start feeling anything and everything. and then emotions would take over and that's the real me nobody really seen before. i'm really very weak and sometimes without knowing it myself i do cry. i know that sounds damn gay and embarrassing and boys aren't supposed to cry and cannot cry. but yea. i'll be stronger.
amanda today never online again. maybe she haven't ok yet. or maybe she avoiding me. cos she likes to avoid ri guys. but if she's still not okay i hope she gets ok soon. haha. i not used to not talking to her. haha.
i really don't wanna like anybody. and i wanna forget every girl. so sad there's nothing that can do that for me.
Ng Guan Yi at 1:08 AM